For instance, as the evening or weekend would draw near, Nick would have planned out how he wanted to spend his time, and I would have planned out how I would want to spend my (or our) time. If our plans didn't pan out, it would really set us off and then we'd start arguing and trying to find fault with the other person. Well, we finally figured out that our issue (in this case) was more from lack of communication on our part than it was with the actual person. So now we often communicate with one another when we're headed into the evening or a weekend. Nick will Skype me or call me as he's about to come home from work (or I will call him), and he'll ask, "What are your expectations for tonight?" I'll tell him, then I usually follow up: "Do you have any plans or expectations for tonight?" Then we agree on a plan of action for that evening.
And can you believe asking that simple question has really prevented a lot of head ache and frustration for the both of us? Because we clearly communicate our desires with each other, it gives us realistic expectations that are usually met and we're rarely let down because of it.
Now the unmet expectations we often struggle with are those expectations that go unmet because of something we have no control over! Take today for example...
Although I had a severe time with my allergies yesterday (and therefore didn't go to Y), I still had it strongly in my mind that I wanted to go to the gym and run today. I took a Benadryl last night, and so I slept well. But I woke up even more miserable than I felt the day before. Also, when I looked outside, I saw that there was a white fluffy layer of snow covering the roads, grass, and sidewalks. So I decided I would just stay home and do a DVD workout when Isaac went down for his nap. When that time came around, I was feeling very tired myself so Nick suggested I just rest. 'Ok...' I thought, 'I'll rest now, and then workout after lunch...' Well, you know that didn't happen! So I was pretty disappointed I didn't get a workout in today. But you know in hindsight, I'm really glad I didn't push my body by doing a workout. If I had, I probably wouldn't be feeling as good as I feel now! So now I'm hoping whatever head congestion (from allergies or a cold) I have is on it's way out!
Also, Nick and I were originally going to go to the gym together this morning. But because we're trying to sell our Pathfinder and that's a priority, it turned out Nick had a couple people that wanted to come by this morning and see it. In fact, someone came by last night and said he wanted it but couldn't get the money to us until today. Nick told him he'd still like to hear what the others were going to offer this morning, and the man said he'd pay so much more than the highest offer up to a certain amount. So we were totally expecting to have our truck sold by this weekend. Was it the weather or just a loss of interest in the vehicle? We don't know. But we never heard from the people who wanted to come see the Pathfinder today. And the guy who came by last night and said he wanted it contacted Nick this morning and said he had changed his mind. Another let down... Darn!
So here's a plug: our Pathfinder's still up on craigslist if anyone is interested!
Now about those unmet expectations... yeah, it's disappointing! But are we going to dwell on it and let it keep us down, are we going to not set such 'high' expectations anymore or none at all so we won't be let down again, or are we going to look forward to tomorrow - another day - and trust in the Lord that it will be better? And in light of eternity, do these unmet expectations really matter? Should I be dreaming bigger than just the day to day? Should I be setting my expectations on things that will impact eternity for the good of God's Kingdom? And why do the 'little' things matter so much to me?
Lord, help me focus on the things that matter!
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